I will never forget the first time I saw Boo. Going private I got to have an early scan, it showed what can only be described as a jelly bean inside me. It still remains my favourite scan to this day. It confirmed that all was going well, it was such a huge relief and now I could tell the world. However, it wasn’t until the 20 week scan that I could finally relax. Knowing he was OK, and all his vital organs were perfect was such a grateful moment. It reminded me of the film Juno for some reason. Perhaps it’s because I had never really wanted or expected to have kids, and even though my jelly bean was planned, it wasn’t until now that I realised how precious he was and how I shouldn’t be taking any of this for granted. I had been blessed, and it was time to start being thankful.
It was around this time, that people started to confide in me. There must be something about a pregnant woman that makes others think ‘she knows what I’m going through’, or perhaps they felt they could be more open. Whatever it was, I started hearing all kinds of stories – how IVF had failed friends I didn’t even know where trying, how some were considering freezing their eggs, and how others had super-sperm that did they trick first time .. actually a lot of men told me those stories! Becoming a confidant to so many people made me realise that behind closed doors, so much is going on, and God only knows how that manifests in hormones. It made me feel a little guilty that I had taken getting pregnant for granted. I now know I’m one of the lucky ones, and all I can hope is that this pregnancy will change me for the better.